What are the real aspirations of today's high schooler?

Today as I was cleaning up my room before leaving work, I found a piece of paper on the ground.  At first I thought it was just some trash student work, written in pretty pink and purple ink that had been left behind.  But low and behold, it was instead the type of literature that teachers such as myself really live for.  I'll change the names and places to keep the anonymity alive, but I'll leave the spelling, punctuation, and grammar as is.  This is as real as it gets folks.  Enjoy!

"Things to do before we graduate.  The high school life."
1.  go streaking in the middle of the night. Who doesn't want to do this?
2.  go skinny dipping in a stranger's pool. You can't do #1 and not want this too!
3.  eat a marajuanna brownie.
4. drift in a mall parking lot.
5. get chased by the cops.  If you play your cards right, you could knock out 2, 1, 5, 7, 4, then 8 together. In that order of course.
6. start a random fight.
7.  go 90 mph up my street.
8.  burn rubber.
9.  go to a rave.
10.  chase a chinese delivery guy.
11.  egg beth's house and pour skittles in her yard.  Everybody knows that the best side dish to accompany eggs is skittles!
12.  meet a hobo.
13.  go on a human catapolt.
14.  go bull riding. (mechanical)
15.  go on a "montage"? The question mark isn't from me, so they don't even know what this means.
16.  go to the overlook.
17.  crash a party.
18.  meet a mime.
19.  dine & dash.
20.  party with the mexicans.  I don't drink beer often, but when I do, I drink dos equis.
21.  ditch school & cross town.  On senior skip day, we ditched class and crossed town too.  Across town was awesome!
22.  shave a guys legs.
23.  wax a guys legs.  If you weren't scared yet, you should be now.
24.  wake up in jail & not know why.  This could seriously impede the act of graduating, therefore changing the validity of the whole list.
25.  jump off a small bridge into the ocean.  This should be changed to "find a small bridge over the ocean that actually exists."
26.  make love to know hands.  I hope "know hands" is a song.  Otherwise I'm as perplexed as you.
27.  egg an apartment complex.  Don't forget your skittles!
28.  pose as a phone sex operator.
29.  put itching powder on the school's toilet seats.  Add some sneezing powder and a pie in the face and you'll have the complete package.
30.  dance on pole.
31.  go to a strip club.  30 and 31... I say kill two birds with one stone.
32.  hang with a midget.  This list could be so much shorter.  If this midget was born south of the border, you could combine this with 20.
33.  cuss out our parents.  I bet this has already happened.
34.  go to a party Friday & come pack Sun.  Sounds fun.  If the party is in jail, this would take care of 24 too.  Efficiency is key.